No News is Good News

RIGHT?

I haven't heard from Dr. Steele, so I am believing no news is good news.  Tomorrow may be different but for today this is what I am feeling.

Did 5 hours of work.  (Once I got rid of the migraine I realized I was tired and a bit achy - go figure).

 :)

Procedure

So I had the procedure on Friday.

I woke up with a migraine and it stayed the entire day okay weekend.

Heidi took me up to the hospital.  As I was in the hall I heard the funniest thing.  Here we are in the same day operation area and I hear a worker ask someone, "Do you have any health problems?"  It made me giggle.

Lots of Dr's and nurses came and went and finally they wheeled me into another room, but by then I was out.  I woke up with the same headache, and just a little abdominal discomfort.  At one point I really really needed to go to the bathroom, but the nurse felt like taking my blood pressure while taking out my IV was more important.  It know it is surprising, but my blood pressure was going crazy.  I don't really know where it should be but it was doing all kinds of crazy stuff.  Once the IV was out it settled down a bit and then I got one of the nurses to let me go the bathroom, and I felt much better.

The nurse was really nice.  She sat and chatted with me.  It was really really nice.  She talked to me about recovery, but also about being ready for the emotional stuff that tends to follow after any surgery.  I was like a light went on...that is what happened with the thyroid surgery.  My frustration and anger were normal. It was so nice to hear someone say I wasn't crazy.  It was surprising to feel so safe with this lady.  She talked about some her struggles in life and how as women we are so hard on ourselves.  How we would NEVER allow anyone to treat someone else the way we allow ourselves to be treated.  That we need to be kinder to ourselves and allow other to do the same.  Heidi went to get  the car and she stayed with me and walked me to the car.  She apologized for getting so personal, but she said something about me drew her to me and she felt safe opening up and sharing with me.  It's amazing how Heavenly Father puts people in our live so we can help each other.

I spent the evening at Deans with Alex aka Dr Banner/Hawkeye watching out for me.  We watched Avengers (as noted by Alex's alias).  Then he slept on the floor beside me to be sure I did okay during the night.  I took pain pills but mostly for my head.

Heidi and I did lunch on Saturday and I had a few sweet sisters from the ward check up on me.  I am just taking it easy this weekend and hopefully by Monday I will be okay to work.  I feel okay, just tired.    Okay and a bit anxious to find out the results of the biopsy.

Tomorrow...

After some waiting and planning and re-planning, tomorrow and the D&C are finally here.    I talked to Dr. Steele and he said the odds of this being cancer are 1 in 100.  I was hoping for better odds.  I feel pretty peaceful, well, really not feeling much about this.  I hope that is a good sign.  I guess we will have to wait till next week to know.

Let's call it a procedure

I had the ultra sound and there was not any obvious sign of growths/lumps/polyps /tumors whatever you want to call it.  Which seems good, but it still doesn't explain the spotting, so Dr. Steele wants to biopsy it, which means a D and C.  It is an outpatient  "procedure".  Although I believe I have met my out of pocket costs for the year, we are going to do the "procedure"  at a physicality that is covered 80% so...it's going to be a month before we do it.

Dr. Gilbert's appointment was better.  Things were going really well.  The wound is healing, the swelling is going down, and my voice is doing well.  Until he asked about it, when of course it cuts out for a second.  We both had to laugh.  The bump under my drain incision surprises him.  It doesn't seem to be shrinking.  But I told him, that if there was some odd thing it would be me it would happen to.    We are going to just watch it for until the next appointment and see what happens then.

Overwhelmed was yesterday.  Woke up ready to cry and spent most of the day doing just that. 

I know I have been caught up in the business of all of this operation and all that it entails.  There so much stuff that needs to be dealt with.  Dealing with hospital, and the insurance.  This was part of yesterdays adventure.  I when I called to see where I was at meeting my deductible I got quite the surprise.  Our insurance was cancelled as of June 30th.  PANIC!!  Turns out there was a late payment. They got the check and by thursday everything will be back to normal.  This is just another tender mercy for me.  If I hadn't called this would be a BIG BIG MESS, now it's a smallish mess that is being taking care of.  Then there is is the little details of life to take care of, library books, primary sub, visiting teaching.  

But today I woke up back at happy again.  Not sure why, but I literally woke up smiling and happy.  I am at peace again. 

Today I am back to feeling the tender mercies of knowing this is the right thing to do.  Just gonna move forward knowing my Heavenly Father is watching over me.  That is where the peace comes from.